Ah this is so familiar. I realised once that doing so is akin to emotional self-harm due to all the triggers that come with looking back at toxic ex jobs and that's put me off for a while. At the same time I think it is a little bit necessary and inevitable to help us process things. I find writing a very useful way of flushing out those feelings and moving on. In case you're curious, I actually just wrote about my own early career journey and how it's impacted my definition of success.
Great post, Jenny! This really resonates with me - some end up being really quite long term relationships, so of course they're tough to get over when they end, and others are short-term ill-advised flings which also leave a scar!
This is an insightful piece on a complex issue! I confess I muted or unfollowed a lot of colleagues straight after losing my last job because I needed distance and found it quite triggering to see them popping up on LinkedIn - although weirdly I still write for that company on a freelance basis. But it doesn't seem to bother me too much as I see it as working with the indvidual people rather than the company if that makes sense? I nosied at my old job recently too to see who had taken it, but felt ZERO pangs of regret that I wasn't still in the post. If anything, my thought was: 'good luck, sucker' 😁
I think it took me about three years to really get over a bad ‘break up’ because it was such a toxic environment that I left feeling crap about myself. Took ages to build back up. I’m still fascinated by the woman who created that environment - in fact I might go and check on her LinkedIn right now!
Past jobs do feel like exes. I try my hardest to avoid looking at them like the plague. "It wasn't you, it was me but also you." There is always a sting but each career move is a step forward - even when we feel stuck. Sometimes I find myself saying, "Thank you God for not giving me the job I thought I wanted." Maybe that's growth. I'm not sure.
Oooh this is a juicy theme Jenny, and something we probably don't talk about enough as employees and freelancers. I once had an MD ask me for dinner in a fancy restaurant and when I got there asked me why I'd left their company and what had prompted me to leave. I reminded them that they'd made a whole bunch of us redundant, including me. Of course redundancies happen but it was a huge surprise for me that they didn't even remember it when it was etched so deeply in me. Definitely a powerful topic for a coaching conversation, those exes.
Ah this is so familiar. I realised once that doing so is akin to emotional self-harm due to all the triggers that come with looking back at toxic ex jobs and that's put me off for a while. At the same time I think it is a little bit necessary and inevitable to help us process things. I find writing a very useful way of flushing out those feelings and moving on. In case you're curious, I actually just wrote about my own early career journey and how it's impacted my definition of success.
https://open.substack.com/pub/wellnesswrap/p/what-is-success?r=oxt7r&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web
Great post, Jenny! This really resonates with me - some end up being really quite long term relationships, so of course they're tough to get over when they end, and others are short-term ill-advised flings which also leave a scar!
This is an insightful piece on a complex issue! I confess I muted or unfollowed a lot of colleagues straight after losing my last job because I needed distance and found it quite triggering to see them popping up on LinkedIn - although weirdly I still write for that company on a freelance basis. But it doesn't seem to bother me too much as I see it as working with the indvidual people rather than the company if that makes sense? I nosied at my old job recently too to see who had taken it, but felt ZERO pangs of regret that I wasn't still in the post. If anything, my thought was: 'good luck, sucker' 😁
I think it took me about three years to really get over a bad ‘break up’ because it was such a toxic environment that I left feeling crap about myself. Took ages to build back up. I’m still fascinated by the woman who created that environment - in fact I might go and check on her LinkedIn right now!
Also adding your substack to newsletter suggested reading :)
Past jobs do feel like exes. I try my hardest to avoid looking at them like the plague. "It wasn't you, it was me but also you." There is always a sting but each career move is a step forward - even when we feel stuck. Sometimes I find myself saying, "Thank you God for not giving me the job I thought I wanted." Maybe that's growth. I'm not sure.
Oooh this is a juicy theme Jenny, and something we probably don't talk about enough as employees and freelancers. I once had an MD ask me for dinner in a fancy restaurant and when I got there asked me why I'd left their company and what had prompted me to leave. I reminded them that they'd made a whole bunch of us redundant, including me. Of course redundancies happen but it was a huge surprise for me that they didn't even remember it when it was etched so deeply in me. Definitely a powerful topic for a coaching conversation, those exes.