Coming second isn't always so bad

Is it...?

Did you watch the Darts last night? Did you watch 16-year old Luke Littler throwing darts on a national stage like a seasoned pro? The world was behind him, cheering him on… and he came second - runner up - in the World Darts Championship.

I’ve just been reading how he’ll be offered sponsorship deals and of course, this is just the beginning of his sports career. The future awaits!

That ‘coming second’ narrative is an interesting one that’s been ringing around my head. Second. Runner up. AKA ‘not first’.

Growing up, I was encouraged to be the best. To be number 1. Literally. At school (prep school, aged 9-12) we had ‘form orders’. Mock exams every term led to percentage scores which were added up and averaged.

Then a form order - the ranking of those averages.

I was ALWAYS second. ALWAYS. The boy who was always first was called Ben.

I fancied Ben, big time. And the only thing I fancied more was beating him in form orders.

I did it, once. Just once.

They’d post the form orders on a giant notice board, we’d all crowd round. The scene in Legally Blonde when she gets the internship always reminds me of it.

The time it was my name at the top was such a joy. I can remember it - and this was a long time ago now, right?

The thing is, I was used to being at least near the top of the class. It was my norm. And with, I think, 11 or 12 in our class, it’s got a ring of big fish, small pond to it. (Even though yes, I was a child, and we shan’t go into whether it’s normal to rank children’s performance against each other on a public forum).

So when sixth form and then uni finally beckoned, I wasn’t ready. I wasn’t ready to be part of a much bigger pond with cleverer people.

And now, too, in work. I strive to be the best and I get frustrated when I’m not. When I don’t get the award, or I don’t secure the client or contract.

Little prep school Jenny wants to know why she’s second place.

But watching Luke Littler - not that much older than prep school Jenny, really - be so cool, calm and happy to be runner up has given me inspiration. It should inspire you, too.

Being second will still bring a lot of positivity into his life. Being second now doesn’t mean you’ll never be first, and being second can sometimes have benefits that being first doesn’t. It also still means there’s a goal on the horizon.

xJenny